


TE FORTY TWO IN DEVMON LOCKS ?!

by TangerineSnippet



Series: Te Forty Two: The Greatest Team Fortress Fic Ever Written [1]
Category: Team Fortress 2
Genre: Dr Phil, Everyone Is Gay, Fortnite Epic Win !!!, Hot, Juul Pod, Lesbian, Lucky (OC) - Freeform, M/M, Mary Sues, Other, Romance, Some inside jokes, Starbucks, Team Switching, Woo Yeah Spy Pussy, Yaoi, Yung Walnut, shitpost
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-14
Updated: 2020-07-15
Packaged: 2021-03-05 02:02:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 2,037
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25256605
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TangerineSnippet/pseuds/TangerineSnippet
Summary: Lucky (my AMAZING OC DO NOT STEAL) meets the team fort characters ? And they go on a silly journey with love, lust, and wacky hijink! Read to find out more!!!!——————Realistically i made this shitpost a while back and now I’m finally posting it. Why has god abandoned us
Relationships: Heavy/Medic (Team Fortress 2), Sniper/Spy (Team Fortress 2)
Series: Te Forty Two: The Greatest Team Fortress Fic Ever Written [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1829791
Comments: 1
Kudos: 5





	1. Sniper x Spy XD

1 day sniper and spy were in gays ex as usal and then PORTALOPENED it was SPY LCUKT and she sAYED

“GENITALMEN COME TO HEL WERE YOU CAN BE GAYSEX’

And thay said “yis” dan went to hecxk

BUT IT RURN OUT EVERY1 THERE

SOLDA BOI

SCUNT

LITERALLY ANYONE ELSE

“Ha ha welcome to hel we hafe 2fort but better” and everyone was like “cool and good”

Everyone was fighting over who got the dirt while medic and heavy where GAY SEXING in the bakcgrou

And then they went back to mortal relm but now Luky and pal on they team

Idk what else to write XD *jumps into yaoi trashcan* thank you 4 reading X3


	2. Lucky becomes a spy and kills lavender

1 day it was cool and good and good and cool but then  
THERE WAS BKLO TEMN IN BASEEEEEEE SO LIKE  
Lucky killed them and became besties with EVERY ?!?!?!?!?!/. Team member

But but then LAVENDER 

“UwU XD I want 2 date le MEDIC OwO” but even medic’s thottery did not extend to treachery  
“Nine lol” and treachery CRIED TEARS but Bendy slaped her amd she deid

BUT THEN ?! Another emeny aprpch!

“Hi I’m vinalla and I date 9 guyss in the spaan of 2 wwek”  
Then Satan.(adfber sexiness with the dice) was like “ok vaial works on REED now no actepton” and everyone was like “oh”  
And vinalla also said “oh” and everywon was like “oh i hate her alreeady”

THEN FIVE NITE WITH FREDY SHOW UP

“Hi name is Springtrap”  
“HEYLO SRPIGNUTJKLEAP”: nd fredbear was there 2  
“I’m cool lol” and everyone lauf

Then one day

“Hi this is Amaryllis/Vainilla and I have no life skill *sips white potion* can I have weapon”  
“Wel” asked them apy “what are you good at, mon ami (not atctually my friend ?! You suck vainolla hat WHATS hate hate HAT)”  
“Wanting to dyi”  
…  
*laugjtet track*  
“Ok tell you what dingus try everything like zootipoa and then y get class I’m spy bc I’m a snake and also spy is hot according. To author” said lucksta the Gup tit master  
“K”  
So vail started with soldiering

“OKAY SON SO POINT THE ROCKET AT THE GROUND AND THINK ABOUT WHERE YOU WANT TO GO”

Vainia did as told and launched into the air, landing on the roof of the BLU base and dying

Solda sied


	3. Heterosexuals

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Simp

COOL BREAK FOR STRAIGHT SHIP ?! Lol

Scout wall up to miss Pauling with flowe

“Oh scout thank-“  
“Ms Pauling look ur rlly hot can you plz date me”  
“Scout I’ve explained this I’m a lesbian”  
“....whTs a lebanese”

“Scout i stg I like women I don’t date dudes z”  
“Aw damnit what the fuck THERES a place in China where women date women sounds kinda dope but”  
“No scout Lebanese is not a place in China”  
“*sad Twink sounds* but why”  
“Bc I am gay and this is fanfiction also fanfic or not I’m everyone’s favorite barely functional lesbian”  
“But rule 34-“  
“I stg I’m gonna have an aneurysm”  
And so miss Pauling had an aneurysm  
“Well Damnit how am I gonna loose virgin now”  
“You could always try . . . Not being an asshole”  
“Too hadd lmao”  
“Ok then there’s always plan W:  
Turn gay like everyone else”  
“Ew no lol *sips tap water*”  
Ok thanks for listening back to Vainilla


	4. Amaryllis/Vainilla Fails at life

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vainilla is amaryllis i changed her name recently so Vainilla is just a nickname for her in this,, in the next book she’ll just be amaryllis

So Vany was tring to be snowp now and repins was teeching it  
“So you see those?” He piited to a bloo team heavy “those are wankers. Shoot all the wankers you can find.”  
Van shot once before backing away in fear of the gun  
“Too loud ÓwÒ”  
Sniper went into cardiac arrest  
“YOURE telling me that you can rocket jump and shoot rockets t your feet, and you can beat up TWo of our toughest teammates *insert flashback of her beating up heavy and Pyro* but you can’t shoot a sniper Rifer? Ok you know what you’re a disgrace to the fucking marksmen”  
“I’m such disappointment I’m gonna kms lmao *eats 20 pounds of ice cream*”  
“Leave”

Am walked out crying and saw RED spy smoking a cigarrete. She decided to JUUL a bit because juuling is just smoking for cowards which is a line Lucky actually says in devils luck  
“Why are you crying (this time)” Reed spy asked  
Amaryllis told a lie to make everyone feel bad X3 poor baby was abused and can build robots UwU “Sniper told me to kill myself,,,, I wish I was dead I’m so fat lmao *Juul*”  
“Well say it enough times and someday it’ll be true *snort*”  
“*It cries*”  
“Look I’ll let you be a spy I’ll get u the soot and everytiog jut try i”

So vein failed instantly lmao

Later at dinner bendy was comsume and everyone ate and truck walked in and It . Was . BALDING .  
“Wtf happened to ur hair” scoot asked  
“Punishment” it answred  
“ACH NEIN! DID ZE BLU TEEN DO ZHIS TO YOU? VHY? ACH I AM GERMAN VE CANNOT READ OR SAY OUR W’S HA HA GET IT AM I FUNNY?”  
“No I did it to myself bc someone told me to kill myself”  
“Talking to yourself again we’re you Vainilla?”  
“Stfu red spy your collar palet is dog shit navy blue better idiot”  
“You day that when your hair is ROTTING away as we speak”  
It’s hair fell on the ground  
“Ok go to the gay baby jail it’s outside in the rain right next to 20 sentries, die” spener said  
“No fuck you”  
“OMG VAINILLA STFU AND DO SOMETHING YOU LITERALLY SUCK YOU ARE THE ACTUAL WORST,” lucky said “you are a bigger snake than me and spy combined and honestly it makes me wonder how you failed the spy class I stg you suck so much dick even medic is jealous you fucking thotty piece of shit fucking fat lazy unlovable attention seeking cunt, die in a hole and go sit in the baby jail”  
The team sat in silence before Bemdy and Bill ciper (he here too XD) sed “AMEN!” And everyone else did to so she stormed outside to sit in the baby jail

Later medic joined her in the abny jail and he was like “ACH Ja I know how to escape” so he stood up and stepped over the baby gate but since poor soft gal is only 5 feet ! She could not so medic snorted at her  
“Why do all you Europeans snort”  
“*Snort* VHY DO DO YOU TRINKT STARBUCK” medic said as he ran off to fuck heavy


	5. HeavyMedic XD

HeVymedic segment! 

Heavy tore medic in two with his horse cock the end lol


	6. Chapter 6

Next day Amaryllis said “I’m hoing to BLU base lol”  
“Nooo wtf” springtrap said  
“You can’t do that idiot” Blackhat said (Hes here too XD)  
“Y’all ain’t heard of team switching? *juuls*”  
“Fine but we get to keep all your animals, that poor fish did not deserve the name Juul pod” Bendy said  
So then everyone beat her to death and then she respawn ED

“Welcome to BLU! Aka RED team but with an altered color palette and different acronym’ everything else is basically the same” said blue soldier

“Cool and good”  
So she was sleeping but then 

“OUI OUI PLUS S'IL VOUS PLAÎT MMMMM PUTAIN MUNDY”  
“Aw yeah you like that don’t you princess yeah fucking take it ya little wank *loud smack noises* Woo yeah spy pussy”

Cain was .  
Why is RED sptber fucking the BLOO spy ?! Eh ,! Well now time for me to plug Frisson De Tuer XD totally read it it’s not not I ruined TF3 for anyone OwU~*

Spy walked in “who tf is this ugly ass bald bitch”  
“Hey I’m van and why Tf are you fucking the sniper from the opposite team”  
“Wel first off almost everyone is gay in fanfic and second of all the author thinks we would make a good love story”  
“...wow your author must be some fourteen year old girl”  
“She is actually its kinda sad *snokes*”  
“Ohhh lmao”  
“Anyway welcome to the team, I can see they gave up on you so now we have to deal with Yoy, so your olny job is to just be the meat shield and do nothing, for the love of god just. Do nothing seriously you get in the way”  
“K lol”  
Eventually vapilla sucked SO BAD THAHT she got kicked into the sun and banned from ever entering BLU or red building

The end of VanPoo arc  
OR IS IT ?!


	7. Under

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sans from fortnite

One day a kid showed up and the kid had a realy cool striped sweater and pyro thot it was ECTRA RADICAL ?!  
“I want to eat the souls of the unborn”  
Pyro liked this kid already   
Then a kid showed up  
“I am goat mom where is child”  
“Right there”  
Pyro was bouncing the child on his lap while showing it cool pictures of death and destruction  
“Ok good also I’m toriel btw I’m from the underground y’all mind if we hang”  
“OF COURSE YOU CAN HANG OUT GOAT LADY”  
Toriel has join party !  
Then SASN  
*Megalvoeana BLAST*  
“YOOOOOOO IS THAT SANS UNDERTALE”  
“Hell yeah it is Scout from Fortnite !” Sans did an orange justice, followed by a default dance and a breakdance spin “Ok guys, this is an epic Peter Griffin Bruh Sound Effect #2 Moment”   
“Hey Heavy”  
“Hey Sans Deltarune”  
“Ok you get bad time I am sans UNDERTALE”  
Heavy died but he Respawn Ed and say sorry to sand so they are friend now  
Sans got to be on team and it was epic   
But turn Cupead   
“Hey guys it’s ya boi Cupheadgamer and today we’re sneaking around in some base it looks kinda lame lmao”  
“Oi you can’t pass the toriel”  
“I STG EVERYONE IS OVER THAT STUPID THING IDC I CAN PASS THE TUTORIAL-“  
“No I mean you can’t pass me bc like this is private property idiot”  
“Oh yea well I’m gonna join the supper dupper ultra mega squad”  
“CUPHEAD WHAT THE FUCK”  
Satan was medykidy . “Hey bitch wtf thisnisnYALIS ONLY also wheres canilla”  
“Oh fuck the yaois idc if u gay m8 I just wanna join also WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE YOU BITC”  
“He’s my dad dingus did you forget”  
“Lucky!’nn Omg it’s been so long ?!l  
“Hi lucky” said the mugman  
“Heylo . . Welcome to squad .”  
Cuphead and mugman join and Satan is disappoint


	8. Smarts Briefcase

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Miss Pauling hentai do not steal -admin

“WAIT WE STILL DUNNO WHERE VAINILLA EENT” dice sed  
“Hey y’all thays nice but SWEET JUMPIN JUNIPER JESUS ON A POPSTICK STICK ON A BICYCLE POOPIN PEACH SEEDS ON THE FLOOR LIKE A COUNTRY BABY ON A HOT JULY SUNDAY AFTERNOON LUCKYS GOT THE BLUE INTEL”  
Everyone did a Nae nae dance while I AINT got no panties on was playing  
Lucky slammed it on the fucking tabl

“OK GUYS THIS IS KINDA EPIC”  
They popped it open and  
“Yo wtf”  
“What is it?”  
“It’s hentai”  
“Is this the funny secret administraot hide ?!?!?!?!? Eh !?!?/ she Hans secret porn of cute lesbian ??!?!?!?!? EHE EBEBE HN!??!”\  
Scout said “Yo boobi” before having a stroke on the floor  
“CALM DOWN SON ITS JUST A DRAWING NOT THE REAL THING”  
“In my Erica opinion SCOUT IZ FUCKING DEAD”  
“Good z I’m glad n”   
“Anyway what now y’all since we got their hentai I mean intelligence what do we do now”  
“Uhhh idk man”  
Then tjere was REIN  
“Aw DANNIT I really wanted 2 go outsie 2day o wel we’ll chil hear busters”  
So everyone was chill


	9. Final battle

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dr fill

And then   
“You THOUGJT you could get rid of me ?! My mom is nature gotd and my nose. Child is also god yes I am god now”  
“I KNEW IT ALLL ALONG” said cupfuck   
“You dingus Youve been here for like 2 seconds” Bill sed  
“So has everyone else”  
“Aw damn fair”  
So everyone batsle amy from sonic hedge nd she died for real this time and they also beat up her trashy boyfriend and sent him to DOC FILL?   
“Hello it is me DF Philadelphia u r ugly u r disgusting you sjoud kys gimme 200 dollars”   
“Howdy doc fil@  
“I’m taking this bitch to the trance”  
So it got sent to the ranch and everyone did a celebratory katozy kick  
The end 

OR IS IT ?! *dramatic music*

Stay tune ! XD thank you for writing


End file.
